for about half of a decade now i've been taking two of those fuckers every morning that i woke up before 11 AM. things sound a lot longer when you can refer to them in portions of a decade, don't they?
so for 5 years i could not come to grips with who i was and why i couldn't do some stuff as well as i had before. instead of acknowledging that I was different than i had been in the past and accepting it, i felt the need to medicate myself against who i was. my doctor decided to medicate me, my parents decided to medicate me, i decided i'd swallow 72 MG of amphetamines before i went to school so that i could perform up to my standards of the past.
but now i don't. since summer i haven't been taking this shit. i come down every morning and look at my bottle of these white devils and feel powerful as all hell because I AM NOT SWALLOWING THEM! i've offended some people, grown closer with some, i am easy going as a tranquilized walrus sometimes and as manic as a fucking hummingbird others. my grades are slipping, my mom is worried, i am no longer "up to my potential" and i FUCKING LOVE IT!
you hear that concerta? I'M NOT TAKING YOUR SHIT ANYMORE, SO FUCK OFF! (sorry for the pervasive language, mom, but i hate this shit!) fuck ADD! fuck this social construct of medication and fuck the idea that i'm not good enough! i'm the best fucking guy a lot of people know and even though i can be a bit radical some times i am so fucking HAPPY everyday because i am alive and i used to wish that i was fucking dead!
my personality is back and i'd rather fail the fuck out of high school before i started taking those god damn pills ever again! this is what freedom feels like, the American ideals have never hit me harder than when i left my color coded bottle from the Target pharmacy closed!
woo-fucking-hoo!
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